India's Madhubani A man in his mid-thirties is tensely standing in the corner of a field in the oppressive heat of a July afternoon in the Bihar state of eastern India. He is waiting while donning a pink blouse and black pants. He is having a huge day today.
In search of a suitable bride, Nirbhay Chandra Jha, 35, has traveled more than 100 kilometers (62 miles) from Begusarai to the Madhubani district in Saurath, a community well-known for its "sabha" or yearly "groom market."Jha anticipates a girl's family approaching him soon to begin dowry discussions. The prospective groom is displayed there with a meager dowry of 50,000 rupees ($630).
He told Al Jazeera, "Had I been younger, I might have easily asked for 2-3 lakh rupees [$2,500-3,700]."
A subset of Hindu Brahmins residing in the Mithilanchal region of Bihar is known as Maithil Brahmins, including Nirbhay. In the intricate Hindu caste system, the Brahmin community dominates society and has historically benefited.
Hindu endogamy traditions typically forbid unions between members of the same clan but promote alliances between members of the same caste, which is why such ties are typically "arranged" by the family.Nirbhay considers himself to be an excellent candidate for a husband because he has a steady job as a manager at a plant and a good income.Despite being prohibited in India, dowery is common and widely accepted, particularly in the neighboring northern states of Bihar and Uttar Pradesh. Experts believe that India spends as much on public health annually as it does on dowry payments, which comes to $5 billion.
They say "Saurath Sabha" is one of the oldest matrimonial websites in the globe. Nearby, approximately 20 guys sit under the trees and talk calmly about the number of grooms who have registered this season.
The tradition of Madhubani, which is a part of the Mithilanchal area of Bihar, appears to have survived modernity even though similar practices have mostly vanished across India.The "groom market"
In this unusual, 700-year-old custom, the potential husbands are on exhibit in front of the ladies' male guardians, who are typically the father or brother. The bride typically has no control over the procedure.
It's as if the bride's family may just choose any man they choose as long as they have the necessary money. It is comparable to a groom market, a resident of the neighboring village told Al Jazeera.The occasion is holy to Maithil Brahmins.
Locals claim that the families of the prospective brides visit the village covertly and watch the men from a distance. Once they have decided, they cover the chosen groom with a Mithila gamchha, a scarlet shawl, to announce their choice in public.
A first-come, first-served policy on public transportation, according to Madhubani resident Jyoti Raman Jha, is comparable to leaving a handkerchief on a bus seat.The event's sparse attendance is indicative of the tradition's declining influence. However, the gathering spot for one of the highest castes of Hindus continues to lure individuals who are having difficulty finding partners from a small pool of potential partners.
Some claim that open bidding for grooms with different dowry tags used to exist in the past. The demand for dowry rises with the groom's profession's prestige. The most in-demand occupations were engineers, doctors, and government employees.
The men today mostly appear to come from villages who have taken a remarkable interest in preserving the custom, based on their appearance. However, it hasn't been simple.Many Indians have been evicted from their ancestral lands due to economic development and urban migration. Additionally, parents now have less influence over the marriage preferences of their offspring. Assisted matchmaking has moved more and more online thanks to affordable internet connection. The largest matrimony websites in the world are located in India.
However, the Saurath gathering is a holdover from an arranged marriage system that has not been tainted by modernization.
The celebration takes place next to a pond in the village that is bordered by numerous peepal, banyan, and mango trees. A large, abandoned well that has recently been decorated with an Indian flag serves as a remembrance of simpler times. Near the pond, there is an old Hindu temple.
As the participants trickle in, a brilliant yellow banner with the words "Saurath Sabha" inscribed in strong red greets them. The ancient peepal tree is said to lose all of its leaves when 100,000 Brahmins arrive at the location.
According to 50-year-old Swaraj Chaudhary, "In the past, buses would run across the state to bring people to the sabha." There are now only a few hundred grooms present at the ceremony.Shekhar Chandra Mishra, a villager and one of the sabha's organizers, attributes the dowry crisis to politicians and the media."The media depicted our sabha as a marketplace with open dowry tags and men being sold like cattle. According to him, phrases such Brahmin "dulha bazaar" (groom market) became widely used.Mishra, though, is unafraid to admit that the occasion has been promoting an open dowry culture for decades.
The practice of dowry is still carried out clandestinely today, he claims. Dowry is viewed as one of the ways to make a return on an investment made by parents in raising their son to be an engineer or doctor.
Despite numerous governments undertaking anti-dowry programs, dowry deaths and homicides remain a major problem in Bihar. Data from the National Crime Records Bureau from 2020 show that Bihar had the second-highest number of dowry deaths in the nation, with over 1,000.
In a recent campaign, the Bihar government pushed citizens to declare their opposition to dowries on their wedding invitations. Graffiti urging individuals to avoid dowry is frequently seen on the walls of residences, businesses, and government buildings.
The threat even gave rise to an odd tradition known as "pakadwa vivah" or captive marriage in the area, in which men were kidnapped by a bride's family and married under duress in order to avoid dowry. Kidnappings of this nature are continuously being reported.People present at the event recall the time when tens of thousands of grooms would arrive dressed in red, ready to be married off after a dowry agreement was made. "Grooms would not consent to get married without dowry," claims a man.
A second man steps in. "One shouldn't be surprised to learn that dowries are common in the sabha. Dowry is customary in India, and the sabha simply reflects that, the man claims.Locals attribute some of the decline in sabha attendance to an increase in Brahmin intercaste weddings, popularly known as "urhar shadis" or "love marriages."
One of those who married outside his caste is Manish Jha, a 31-year-old from Darbhanga in Bihar. His family and the community strongly opposed his marriage to a Rajput woman.
"Once I was even held hostage with a gun. But I really did love her," he admitted to Al Jazeera, adding that he had married his wife despite threats of death. Together, they now have a son.
"The community's younger generation doesn't want to limit itself. No matter their caste, they want to wed the person they love, he claims.diminishing tradition
Despite this, Manish feels that the Saurath Sabha should be kept because it is a significant part of Mithilanchal's culture.It also assists the underprivileged in making money. Many people make enough money for the upcoming few months during the sabha, he claims.
Near the location of the sabha, Ghanshyam, a carpenter and member of a lower Hindu caste, sells tea. He claims that in the past, shop owners would celebrate this time of year since their sales would soar.
"However, fewer people are attending presently. My father used to assure me that the sabha would produce enough income to last for six months.
While sales would increase slightly during the festival, according to Sonu, another shopkeeper, they did not really matter these days.
Some attendees claim that they are turned off by the simplicity of online dating.The prospective groom's father, Muktinath Pathak, thinks that his son Amarjeet will be safer being married at the Saurath Sabha than through a marriage website.
He continues as he blends into the crowd, "When the marriage is done online, there is a possibility of divorce and separation, but not when customs are followed.Since it is against the rules to marry within the same clan, the organizers of the Saurath Sabha assert that their approach is far superior to science. Locals hold the belief that marriage within the same clan results in "impure" offspring, which is derived from the ancient Hindu literature of Manusmriti.
Jyoti, a native of Madhubani, adds that in order to find a match at the occasion, one must first approach a panjikar, a traditional record-keeper or registrar, who has kept records of Maithil Brahmin households for decades in order to make sure that potential partners are not related by blood.
According to the rigorous rules of the panjikar system, the bride and groom must not have been blood relatives for seven generations on their father's side and five generations on their mother's side.
The parents proceed with wedding preparations after the registrar permits a match for a sizable price.A panjikar named Pramod Kumar Mishra claims to have set up a tent at the sabha and claims that he was married there in 2003. "My wife's family picked me. We are now living contentedly, he claims.
The panjikars still visit households to register births and deaths in Brahmin families and keep a large book of data. They are searching for alternative sources of income when their children relocate out of the state in pursuit of other employment because their regular work is no longer in high demand.
According to Kanhaiya Kumar Mishra, "We are possibly the last generation of panjikars."
It's almost time for dinner. My brother needs to find a wife, a woman loudly announces as she approaches the sabha.
To select a bride for her 33-year-old brother Sumit Mohan Mishra, Mehek Pandey traveled from Uttar Pradesh with her husband, mother, and grandmother. His wedding was scheduled for June, but the bride's family cancelled, leaving the groom's family in a bind.
The family spent more than 24 hours traveling by bus and train to Madhubani to attend the sabha after their efforts to locate him a suitable bride in their area were unsuccessful.You can no longer rely on internet matrimonial applications for weddings since they are just not legitimate. Mehek revealed to Al Jazeera.
[zombify_post]





















0 Comments